We all have difficult people in our lives-you know, those folks of radically differing viewpoints who anger, exasperate, frustrate, and nearly drive you out of your mind! Well, braiding a beaded kumihimo project can be just as challenging as dealing with difficult people.
How so? With difficult people, whenever there is disagreement, a difference of opinion, a different approach, a departure from the way things are usually done, there is conflict. With a difficult beaded kumihimo pattern, whenever a bead does not fall into place, the cording is not long enough, the beaded braid looks as if it has lost its shape, there is conflict!
How to Manage Difficult People & Beaded Kumihimo Projects
A person or kumihimo project doesn’t have to be bad to be difficult. Conflict happens even among the finest people and most stunning of beaded kumihimo designs. It’s a fact of life that not everything is perfect or going to happen as you plan it.
Some unpleasant situations bring about better things. The people we find the most difficult are usually those who offer the greatest opportunities for growth. Here are a few tips to learn how to manage both difficult people and challenging kumihimo designs.
- Deal with it Head-on. Manage the difficulty while it is occurring. Look for the real problem and don’t allow yourself to be thrown off by minor unrelated details or side issues that distract and get in the way. Go directly to those with whom you disagree or have a conflict. Avoid behind-the-back criticism. When working with kumihimo, check the beaded braid regularly to make sure you are keeping the pattern, and if there is a mistake, stop at once and re-trace your steps until you can re-establish the pattern. I learned this the hard way with the Magatama Rope Beaded Kumihimo Braiding Project. Almost at every stage, from placing the cords into the disk to finishing, I had to stop and handle one challenge or another.
- Handle the Anger & Negative Emotions. Take a break when conversations get heated, and above all, control any physical impulses. Don’t let the other person’s difficult behavior preoccupy you. If you are getting frustrated with your beaded kumihimo project, park the cord for your next move and put it away for a few moments (or days, if needed). Control any impulse to throw it in the trash bin or across the room!
- Breathe First and Then Respond. Use a variety of stress-reducing strategies when you are in conflict. Try breathing slowly and deeply to regulate stress producing Adrenalin. Remain calm and act in a non-defensive way. The ability to be calm in the face of conflict will help you to think more clearly and carefully. Take a time-out before and after braiding a difficult section of the beaded kumihimo project. I had to take a lot of time-outs when making the project featured in this post. I was convinced that the beads were my enemies!
- Learn and Grow. Difficult people, though painful to work with, are necessary for growth and maturity. Ask yourself, “What can I learn here? Do I need to change my behavior or offer an apology? While I couldn’t offer an apology to an inanimate object like this beaded kumihimo rope, I did channel my frustration into a learning moment so that I would not continue to make the same mistakes in future projects.